This is kinda................
Playing with sis's hair is only possible when she is so engross with playing blackshot. (Y)
OMG, such awesome long hair !! I'm sooo jealous ! .
Speaking of which,
there was once a girl who asked me if i'm jealous or
whether if i dislike my sister because she is prettier then me .
Because she stated that " If my sister prettier then me, i will jealous one ''
When I heard it, I found that girl kinda pathetic.
( she has 4 brothers , kinda pretty but nowhere near my sister's chio-ness )
Seriously?? Who the hell would be jealous of her own sister mans??
Ok, maybe she would think that way because she doesn't have a sister herself.
so she assumed that she would be jealous.
Or maybe she is just super duper insecure about herself.
Firstly, I am very proud of my sister.
And I don't deny that I go for looks thou,
and I like hanging out with my sister because I can flaunt my pretty sister around.
But it doesn't mean that I only hang out with her because she is pretty there are other reasons too
and one of them is her being pretty .
Secondly, I don't feel inferior compared to my sister
Because when someone wants to make friends with me,
I don't have to constantly worry about their motives of being friends with me.
Thirdly, I don't think I am in any way uglier then my sister.
i don't mean it in the appearance way.
I meant the uhm, character ok. ? LOL.
Oh SHIT!
I have CE assignment to do !
BYE !
Me in a day. ~ 27May2011
Hello awesome people who awesomely reads my awesome blog.!
Ok, first up, sorry for the delay in blogging. It's been like what? 7days ? (new record for me thou - to not blog that long.) Usually, I'll just look so miserable so much so that my dad will give in and let me use the computer just for blogging purposes. LOL.
Dad's got a new white iPhone4, and he is giving it to sis.
When I have been wanting one (Iphone4 not the white one) since last year.
I'm not whining, just trying to remind myself. Life is unfair.
Anyway, this post will be for 27th May 2011, (where I didn't get the chance to blog)
So, after school that day, I changed into my home clothes and went all the way down to pasir ris to meet some awesome people in my life.
After which, we went to suntec city's convention hall for ASGF (Audition Sea Game Festival)
I took many many photos and uploaded them onto facebook. You can see them here
Oh what the hell! Blogger (or my com) is having some issues with my photos, and I can't upload them directly onto blogger. FML♥
I shall be a good blogger today and host them onto photobucket before transferring them here. LOL. -self praise-
Ok, you know what? I can't upload it onto photobucket either -pouts lip-.
Just as well. I still too lazy to host to another website. :D
Oh YES! I got something uploaded !!
My cursing and swearing kinda agitated the computer to allow me to upload partial photos. LOL.
Eminence Family @ ASGF.
This is like , less then a quarter of my awesome friends.
And guess what happened that night??
-drum roll-
MY AWESOME BESTIES DECIDED TO VISIT ME @ HOME!
After we met, it's like, we've never not met in a long time,
or never went into different schools.
It's just so natural for us to just "chill" together.
It's so much more difficult when I'm in ICB thou.. I don't know , but it's still too early to say that right?
There's still the AGAPE camp ..
Oh and Jo finally learnt english words that I didn't know. :D
Bun & Chuan just got cleverer =3=. How unfair.
And Rene was not here coz bun didn't phone her. ROfls. And we called her to chat via phone w us,
so we wouldn't feel so mean.
What an unglam pic. LOL.
I love you guys.
Its that love that gets me through everyday alone in class, & recces.
Also my family, who loves me. and myself who loves myself very very much rofls.
Ok, till next time !
byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Never say never, I will fight till forever.
To be or not to be that is a question - Shakespeare
To hit a bitch or not to hit a bitch, that is a question - Celina Pang
Hello! About that sentence above.. What can i say?
I miss the old me. I can't believe it! I'm actually missing C3l!n@ !!
Ok, anyway, this week had been quite a fruitful week. I met up with my secondary school friend, audition friends. And hung out with my siblings for a whole day without trying to kill or irritate each other - my brother of course, whoever would dare lay a finger on my sis?? Cept mom and dad LOL - Anyway, that's not the main point. The main point is, I'm scared to post about my everyday life because of creepy stalkers .!
I only post about thoughts and really random stuffs because that is the only thing I can post... i think. And the whole problem is, my thoughts cannot be written down in words. It is so deep, complex, and mixed up . I don't even know where to begin !.
So ,the summary of this whole post is, I AM SO HAPPY THIS WEEK!,
mehh, tomorrow's Monday. And I'm already looking forward to the weekends already.
One more thing before you start to feel irritated kays??
I absolutely detest people who uses the F*** word to describe things, like, "Ohh, your cousin is so f***ing cute" , or "you are so F***ing hilarious!!" Please, I know i am hilarious, but I don't think I am so hilarious that i want to get f***ed by you, or vice versa. Can't they just say something like, "You are as hilarious as miley cyrus falling face down on the floor!" . And don't use the word "freaking" , because it still means the F*** word, and it's disrespectful. To be something of F***ing value is nothing for me to be proud of. KA-PISH??
Thank God It's Friday.
I got tired of pretending, who am i deluding? Myself?
This is stupid. I wished that you guys would be mature enough and start acting your age. It was so much different imagining the things that were going to happen, but when it does. Every thing just sort of slips out from your palms. And it's too late to do anything to stop it. Before you know it, it has already escalated into something so big so wrong and so irreversible.
THE HOT AND STUFFY WEATHER CONTINUES TO KILL US WITH ITS HOTNESS.
Sigh. Life is so complicated idk anymore. I wanted to blog more but I'm running out of time yikes.
therapeutic smile
OH YES I'M SUPPORTING YOU PATRICK. (Y)
"Today I saw someone who looks like you on the bus, I can't help but stared and stared and stared. It's like I had lost all my willpower. Finally I looked away and the spell broke."
I don't like feeling so vulnerable, lost and so easily broken. Maybe I always try to act strong, and tough. Just because I don't like people to see how weak and how easy it is to mash me up inside. Everything is so wrong, nothing came out as I have expected. I didn't think that, I will have another chance, I do not believe in second chances, second chances are just like an invisible green card for someone to make the same stupid mistakes again. Pointless. & the results, disappointing.
Sometimes, it sucks to be strong, because when people think that you are strong, they think it is okay to hurt you. Over and over again.
I don't like feeling so vulnerable, lost and so easily broken. Maybe I always try to act strong, and tough. Just because I don't like people to see how weak and how easy it is to mash me up inside. Everything is so wrong, nothing came out as I have expected. I didn't think that, I will have another chance, I do not believe in second chances, second chances are just like an invisible green card for someone to make the same stupid mistakes again. Pointless. & the results, disappointing.
Sometimes, it sucks to be strong, because when people think that you are strong, they think it is okay to hurt you. Over and over again.
Wide awake
I HATE FACEBOOK.
Okay? This will be a short entry, since I'm not in the correct state of mind now, if I were to continue blogging it'll all be about how crappy my day is blah blah blah. It's like, this thing that is supposed to be insignificant, but it's eating me up . Okay sorry for the big, bold caption above, it's not Facebook's fault, but I just need to blame somebody. How silly of me. It's MY fault, actually.
I HATE MYSELF.
Like this? :)
Damn. I'm still so young, why am I emo-ing?! Argh I'm contradicting myself now. CRAP SHIT I'M GOING INSANE. This is getting from bad to worse. Who bothers anyway? Haha :)
I'm sorry I had to write all this crap on my blog. But I just had to, if not I will burst. Blogging calms me down after I had vent all my anger and sadness and whatever shit on it. Yeah actually blogging's a great way to relieve stress. How I wish I have a blog that I can write everything that happened (even though it's something stupid), without the chance of people reading it, which is impossible. My mind is now all mashed up. The bad news is: I'm in reality.
Okay I promise that the next entry won't be so crapped anymore. (I hope) I need KBox badly badly badly now, to yell my stress out. Damn. Once again, I'm really, really sorry if any of you find this post disturbing. You don't have to feel sorry for me or anything (ok don't get angry at me too :X) because it's my own problem. Oh and I actually sighed yesterday night without even knowing that I'm sighing, until I stopped what I'm doing then I realized that I actually made a sighing noise. First time in my life I sighed without noticing, haha. Maybe I should try something extreme, like bungee jumping! Okay no link :X
I'm feeling a bit better now after typing this whole chunk. Yay. And haha, it isn't a short entry like I had expected at first :X Oops. Sometimes I get disgusted at myself for being so emo too, yikes :(
都是我太爱面子了。
Don't believe the things you tell yourself so late at night and you are your own worst enemy, you'll never win the fight. - (Cheryl Cole's Parachute)
When you know you can't get it.
It's so pathetic, 1st month of school and I cried 3 times.
I don't think I can stay in a class like this for 2 years.
Before I do anything stupid like cutting myself or jumping off a building,
I'd rather leave before I suffocate to death.
If my transfer of courses is successful, I will post up the "reason"
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly, I will not give up until I touch the skies.
在不知情况之下
人，往往都是这样的。
你说不喜欢我，
我不难过也不惊讶
你了解我的为人吗？ 你认为你认识我吗？
你既不去了解我， 也不把自己放在我的立场去想。
你有比我善解人意吗？ 你不知道。
你有比我乐于助人吗？ 你也不知道。
那你为何不去想想自己到底有什么资格否定我？
我觉得很可笑
因为人，本来就是这样的。
根本无法了解的人，事， 物。
统统都否定，统统都讨厌。
装着没恶意，装着没有错。
厌恶了这些无聊的游戏。。。
This is not the first time where I got dislikes from people that don't know me at all.
This is also not the first time people assume they know me.
People are like that, I've learnt not to blame, just take it in stride,
I am not here to please. I am here to be myself.
Oh and I swear it'll never be my last.
你说不喜欢我，
我不难过也不惊讶
你了解我的为人吗？ 你认为你认识我吗？
你既不去了解我， 也不把自己放在我的立场去想。
你有比我善解人意吗？ 你不知道。
你有比我乐于助人吗？ 你也不知道。
那你为何不去想想自己到底有什么资格否定我？
我觉得很可笑
因为人，本来就是这样的。
根本无法了解的人，事， 物。
统统都否定，统统都讨厌。
装着没恶意，装着没有错。
厌恶了这些无聊的游戏。。。
This is not the first time where I got dislikes from people that don't know me at all.
This is also not the first time people assume they know me.
People are like that, I've learnt not to blame, just take it in stride,
I am not here to please. I am here to be myself.
Oh and I swear it'll never be my last.
Random .
This really cracked me up a little ><''
Usually, I wouldn't blog when I'm in class. or in a lesson.
It's too noisy, and I cannot really settle down on my thoughts.. Too easily distracted.
Had a nightmare last night,
Was supposed to meet my secondary clique, and had bought tickets for all 5 of us (including myself)
When I just waited , and waited , and no one came.
And then, they all called and smsed to cancel out on me.
I cried.
---Randomly---
This sucks, I don't have to prove anything,
I don't have to explain
whats the point when you aren't going to believe me either way?
Real friends, don't need an explanation, because they will forgive you, regardless.
Those that aren't friends, will not accept your explanation.
I think I'm too mature for anything. ROFLs.
Why won't you answer me? The silence is slowly killing me
Happy 20th birthday Sis!
I know , that you have always been the stronger one .
You have always been the one protecting me.
I feel really lucky to have a sister who dotes on me so much.
And I am really lucky to have a best friend like you, god sent me to be your sister, so that you can be my best friend.
Other people have to find their best friends but I already have you, even before I was born.
I know we say mean things to each other and fight a lot.
( i just don't like that you always win LOL)
But we will never fall out, worry about offending each other, or apologise,
because I know that no matter how shitty I did things, I will ALWAYS be forgiven by you, and vice versa.
Once more, a big happy 20th birthday ! And *ahem* please behave yourself.
I am in misery, there ain't nobody who can comfort me
I absolutely detest people who expects me or any other student to give up their seat to them .
I am o.k. with giving up seats to people who needs it more than I do.
But I don't like it when people act as thou I am obliged to give it up to them.
I don't OWE them a seat.
I paid my bus fare just like everyone else had.
And I am a human too.
I will feel tired, I will want people to give up their seats to me too.
Just because I LOOK young and wear an ITE/ secondary school uniform doesn't mean I won't fall ill or faint.
It doesn't mean that I don't deserve to have a seat at all.
Yes, ranting like crazy because a mad women was unhappy with me not giving up my seat to her just because I'm so freaking tired.
Why don't you point your fingers at those other people who were on the way home from work?
Just because they didn't have a uniform ??
Or just because I'm a teenager??
"Are you going to piggyback me to the hospital
if I faint after giving up my seat??"
Regardless, I will still move on, with my head held high .
Hello retards. Naww, I love you all. Haha.
I realised something..
I don't know how long I have been thinking about this..
But today, I suddenly had this "I told you so" feeling etc.
And somethings are just like what it was when people don't know me.
Sorry for being so random .
I have so much on my mind, it's just a jumble of mixed up words and emotion.
And I don't really know how to express it nor write it down here.
Let's just say,
Sometimes, you think that god hasn't been fair enough, to you.
Or how your friends or family isn't cherishing you..
Or, sometimes you think to yourself "Oh, I deserve better then THAT"
And then, you were thrown into a completely new surrounding, new faces, new friends, teachers etc.
You realised that, the people whom you thought aren't good enough for you,
who doesn't appreciate you, had all been treating you like a jewel.
You realised that they had loved you so much more then they ever know,
forgives you for everything little shit you had done.
And still loves you even when they know CLEARLY all your flaws.
And you started to realise that, you haven't been cherishing all the gems god had sent to you.
That's life isn't it? You only cherish after you've lost it.
I'm a book half unread
There's so much more to life than being "pretty".
There's so much more than spending hours of your time styling your hair, putting on makeup, or tanning.
If that's what makes you happy, if feeling pretty is what keeps you going, then by all means continue to do what you can.
But I beg of you to think about more important things.
There are books to be read, things to learn and people to be met.
Being beautiful is only temporary.
We all get older, we all become less attractive, it happens to the best, and worst of us.
So spend your younger years enjoying life, rather than wasting hours trying to look like what society wants you to look like.
Please.
May may bring me love, joy & happiness.
Flawless
I don't need you to point out all my flaws time and again.
I know how shitty I am.
tyvm.