About the recent quarrel I had with Shin, I am tired of people asking me , thru SMS, facebook or even twitter.
You want to know, I am not afraid to say.
I am just tired of explaining the same. freaking. things, over and over, again and again.
Because it is very painful for me to think about it, let alone talking about it.
So people have different types or groups of friends.
I have my gaming friends (which is where shin is)
My secondary school clique, My ITE clique, my pubbing friends etc. etc.
Recently, my pubbing friends showed me something which wasn't bad, but demeaning about me.
Which was tweeted/SMS-ed/facebook published by my gaming friend Annabel Yeo.
If you could still call her a friend by now.. LOL
Of course I was mad, shocked, sad and very very pissed.
So I sms-ed shin who was studying for his exams. (do I look like I gave a damn?)
It was not full of vulgarities, but it wasn't nice either.
I was angry, angry people do stupid stuffs.
I know that is not an excuse, but I blog to vent my frustrations, not to get your understanding.
Later, Shin did not reply, and Annabel smsed me trying to "clarify"
I know what I saw, ok.
the conversation was more of my being a bitch and she "apologising".
It went something like
Me : You know what you did
Her : What I do??? ):
Me : Forget it
Her: So is it a misunderstanding?
Me: No, it's not
Her: Sorry ..... if I had done anything wrong
Me : No, you are not sorry.
Actually, I was really being mean, but I deleted everything so I am not really sure how to be mean again, since I really don't give a fuck so much now.
So I thought it was nothing liao mah, actually, I really don't care what shit she said behind my back.
I still treat her as a friend, because what she says may be demeaning, it is not purposefully intended to make me look bad.
Suddenly I received ONE WHOLE CHUNK of shit from Shin via whatsapp,
demanding I "produce" evidence, and saying that there are "thousands" of Annabel Yeo.
He is fucking suggesting that I am wrongly accusing Annabel.
Do I look like a stupid blonde bitch accusing people of something that they didn't do without factual evidence?
If it had been someone else, I wouldn't have been so angry.
But no, of all people it had to be LUM ZI SHIN.
The guy who I treat as my younger brother.
The guy who I care for dearly.
The guy who I can do a lot of things for and give up many stuff for.
I am not saying he owes me or what.
I am just saying it hurts me because shin is someone who matters a lot to me.
It's like random people coming up to you telling you they hate you is not much as painful than your parents wishing they never had you.
What he suggested is that I am wrongly accusing Annabel without proof. Bitch please, you think I nothing to do wanna go around accusing people of defaming me?
What I am angry is him for not trusting me. Annabel tell you that she never say anything about me you believe her, den come and scold me?
How long have you known me, how long have you known that slut?
Even without Annabel in the issue, Shin has never trusted at all.
I take pride in being fucking loyal to my peers, and I am not about to be regarded like a loose two-faced bitch, alright?
Kun called, the next day.
I didn't want to blow up the matter, I just told Kun I didn't want to be associated with Shin any longer.
And that night, Kun conferenced us, and I said everything I had to say.
Vented all my frustrations.
I told Shin I am not angry anymore, just hurt, dissapointed and abit bruised.
I also did say that once the phone is hunged up, I am in no way associated to him.
Don't come to me when you have a problem
Don't think about me when you need help.
Don't read my tweets, my blog, my facebook statuses.
Because as far as I am concerned you no longer exists.
Also, Kun asked me if I will forgive shin and be friends once more because he will.
I honestly don't know. Not now at least...
But in a few years time, who knows?